Thursday, 27 March 2014

Ten things I would like my daughter to know...

There's a lot of lists being passed about on Facebook at the moment; 30 things to never do, 30 things to tell your daughter etc. Some I whole heartedly agreed with and some I was less sure, which lead me to think if I could give little b ten things to live by, what would they be? So after much thought here they are; if you like them feel free to share and feel free to add your own.

1. Don't be afraid to be different. Don't be afraid to be the same. 
Don't be afraid to be you. You are wonderful, unique, beautiful, special and you. Be whoever you want to be and celebrate it.

2. Look after your body; you only have one. Feed it foods that nourish it, move to keep it strong. Sleep to allow time to repair.  Love it, cherish it and be kind to it. Eat well for health, move for health. Look after your body and it will look after you. 

3. Take pleasure in simple things. There's beauty in small moments. Yes, sometimes life can be messy, hard and trying but there's always a reason to smile; mine is you! Happiness is in simplicity, the less you need to be happy the happier you are.  Take time to find those small moments of happiness each day; it might be in your morning cup of tea, the kindness of a stranger, your daughter's smile. Those moments are there you just have to look for them.

4. Be kind to yourself. It's okay to mess up, it's okay to cry. It's okay to feel angry, it's okay to make mistakes. No one is perfect but to me you always will be. Likewise be kind to others; no one is perfect so don't expect them to be.

5. You will always be perfect to me. No matter what.

6. Learn to let things go. Holding onto resentment, anger or guilt is exhausting and debilitating. Live in the now. Likewise let other's faults go too; you will only hold relationships back. Don't waste time on negativity, there's too many wonderful things to focus on instead.

7. Take risks. Life is too precious, too short and too beautiful to squander.  You want to be a writer? Then write! A singer; then sing!  Maybe you'll make it, maybe you won't but at least you tried. You may just have to find creative ways to pay the rent... But don't let that hold you back.

8. Don't waste time on fear and self doubt. You might not be great at something but at least having a go means your doing it. Time and practise will always lead to improvements. You can be anything you want to be, you just have to try. Always try your best then you will never let yourself down.

9. This too shall pass. Sometimes life is hard, sometimes life is very hard. But in a few years you will look back on struggles and see that you survived, you moved on and you are stronger; "life is not about waiting for storms to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain." (Vivian Greene.)

10. Love. Love yourself, love others, love your dog, your cat, your friends. Love brings great joy, great happiness and makes life worth living. Don't be afraid to love with your whole heart; just like I love you!

Sunday, 2 March 2014

Hello Boobs! ;)

Before little B was born I could count on one hand the number of people who'd seen my boobs; I wasn't someone who sunbathed topless and certainly not someone who'd parade around a changing room boobs out.  But then little B was born and that all changed; first the delivery room, then the midwives, then the wonderful lactation consultants, my NCT friends, parents, grandparents (why do relatives always watch?!), you catch my drift. Now it's a general day to day occurrence; the packed tube carriage the other day, the bus last week and yes the entire doctor's surgery yesterday.  But this is not because I have decided I don't care who sees, or am making a pro-breastfeeding statement.  Yes, I am pro-breastfeeding and proud to still be breastfeeding at nine, nearly ten months. Yes, I do love being able to nourish and sustain my daughter and believe that as a mother I have a right to feed my daughter as and when she needs it. And no, I don't want to give her a meal in the bathroom, Why should I? Or really, why should she?! Who wants to eat in a loo?!
BUT I am not deliberately choosing to show this much boob. Believe it or not, I am actually still a little shy about getting my boobs out to feed. But try telling that to little B. Little B is at the stage- I'm sure many of you know well- where she will pull out a boob when she wants it (she knows how to release them now!) have a bit of milk. Stop. Look around. Make a loud noise drawing all eyes our way... Go back on. stop, back on and repeat... So what am I to do? Pop the boob away every few seconds? Fairly pointless, it'll be back out in a minute and she finds it upsetting to have her favourite toy taken away mid-play! Use a shawl? Well let me tell you that gets thrown off!  Plus I can't see my daughter feed, can't make vital eye contact to bond with her and it's hot and stuffy in there for little B eating with her head fully covered. Also why should she do her eating hidden away like that?  Likewise layered clothing and scarves are shoved aside, or get in the way.  So where does this leave me? As I am; boob out, little B hanging off whilst I grin and bare it (excuse the pun!) and you know what? I'm learning to be ok with that, yes it's a little embarrassing at times but I'm happy little B is enjoying her food :) and proud that I am lucky enough to be able to feed her. Proud that my boobs can do such a wonderful job.

So I've decided that next time my boob is out, for all too see, I'm going to take a deep breath and be proud of myself and the breasts that are feeding my beautiful little girl. And you know what mamas? You should feel proud too! You made and are now sustaining life. You rock: your boobs rock! So bare them with pride ;)

Happy feeding all,
Love Mama Amore Xxx